Lucy came home from grocery shopping a while ago with 35 pounds of chicken thighs she got for 35 cents; not 35 cents per pound, total cost 35 cents. It was going out of date tomorrow and she happened to walk by as they marked it for clearance, at least that’s what she claims.
“Okay lady, put the gun down; you can have the chicken. My wallet’s only got a couple of bucks; but you can have it too, just put the gun away.”
“Next week I’ll be back and you’d better have some lean ground round at a reasonable price or you’ll be pushin’ up Daisies, pardner!”
Lucy was in the kitchen for the past hour or so stripping the skin off and putting all that chicken into freezer bags. 35 cents; unbelievable! I often joke that one day the manager of the local Kroger’s is going to come outside as Lucy drives up and hand her a twenty in an attempt to get her to shop some place else.
This past week a 56 year old woman was arrested for robbing a couple of banks here in the Houston area. They nick named her the ‘Grandma Bandit’. Bold as it might sound, she never attempted to disguise her features during the hold ups. Maybe she watched that movie with George Burns and figured she couldn’t lose; if she got away clean she’d have the money and if she got caught she’d have a place to stay rent free with three meals a day and full medical coverage.
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