Changing a Light Bulb

 

It used to be a simple task to change a light bulb.  If the one in your table lamp quit, unscrew the old one, take a new one out of the box that’s in the cupboard and screw it back in.  That’s it, you’re done.

This morning while preparing a bagel, when I turned on the vent-a-hood light to better see where the pre-cut bagel separation needed to be completed so the two halves of the bagel would slide down into the toaster…where was I, one of the light bulbs in the vent-a-hood had burned out.  I prefer the warm glow given off by the vent-a-hood lights over the cold white given off by the overhead kitchen lights.

I then remembered how much fun it was replacing one of those fancy two pronged bulbs; sarcasm mode engaged. Think about Ralphy in the movie, The Christmas Story, when he was helping his dad change the flat tire when he accidentally lost control of the lug nuts; that same terminology comes to mind.

The vent-a-hood actually came with a specially designed suction cup tool to assist in replacing a light bulb.  If you happen to misplace that tool it could be replaced for about $25.00. Our house is now seven years old; but that replacement tool is a permanent fixture in our Junk Drawer and will be there long after any nuclear explosion has wiped away our civilization. Twenty-five dollars for a suction cup that might cost all of a nickel to make, Geesh!

Lucy was going to be away getting her hair done for the next hour; what better time than now to get this chore out of the way.  I went to the main closet, the one in the den where only the most important stuff is stored, where I knew I’d placed a package of replacement Two-Pronged Light Bulbs, the kind that fit the track lights as well as the vent-a-hood. 

I found two spray nozzle replacements for the outside water hose, three emergency flashlights, four dual purpose screwdriver sets that let you change from Phillips to Flat head; all were unopened and still attached to the cardboard just like we’d seen them at the store.  Not seeing those light bulbs as I dug some more.

I had to move some of the empty ammo boxes out of the way to get a better view of the other junk.  We buy these ammo boxes when Harbor Freight puts them on sale half off; they make for great containers at Christmas gifts for the guys in our family.  You can put their favorite candy bars, bags of pistachios, a small emergency flashlight or even a box of ammo that fits their favorite weapon. That’s when I found a pack of tie down straps, still attached to the cardboard and ready to use.  Hmm, those were supposed to be in the back of my truck.  Still no Two-Pronged Light Bulbs.

I rearranged some of the battery chargers that work with my power hand tools.  Found a stack of electrician’s tape, that stuff sure comes in handy; but not today.  I put that with a container of bungie cords, love having extra bungie cords. 

Maybe I put those Two-Pronged Light Bulbs up with the regular light bulbs. I got out the step stool ladder and checked above the freezer next to the cans of baked beans and mayonnaise; no, they’re not there either.  Better go back to looking in the den closet.

Found the new staple gun with two boxes of staples we were going to use when reupholstering the fabric covered dinning room chairs.  I wonder where we stored that new fabric?  That can wait another year or so; today’s project is to replace a Two-Pronged Light Bulb in the vent-a-hood. 

Aha! There’s the package of Two-Pronged Light Bulbs, right where I knew they’d be behind the roll of drywall tape.  I put the ammo boxes back, closed the door to the closet and turned off the closet light.

The suction cup tool worked exactly as it was supposed to and the Two-Pronged Light Bulb was replaced in less than a minute.  Piece of Cake!