Tuesday, February 26, 2008

One Thousand

I know how insignificant numbers are; when taken out of context they have no meaning at all. For proof of my statement all you’d have to do is ask President Dewey; you mean Dewey didn’t defeat Truman?

When I was very young and my father was about to leave for his weekly bowling league I’d always tell him, “Bowl a hundred”, not knowing that a hundred in bowling wasn’t the same as a hundred on a school paper. The message came out as, “I love you Dad, do your best!” To this day I use the same expression to let him know I love him.

I noticed when I posted my last article the clicker showed 999 blogs had been filed since starting this interesting melting pot of loose screws and left over Halloween candy. I wanted to post something right away; just get over that hump so I could get to work on the next thousand articles.

There was an off color joke about the sex education teacher trying to break the ice with a new class of students. He asked for a show of hands; how many various positions there were between lovers. Hands went up across the room along with some unseemly laughter. The teacher would point to those holding up a hand and get answers from one to ninety nine. Rather than let the introduction go on too long the teacher asked the young man who’d responded, “One”, to elaborate.

Quite shy and intimidated at the prospect of having to explain such intimacies before his fellow classmates he reluctantly explained the “Missionary Position”, where the man’s on top. All at once the young man in the back who’d previously rejoiced and bragged at ninety nine could hold his exuberance no longer, jumping up and shouting, “One hundred!”

Well, today I hit 1000, maybe not such a big deal for you; but a mile marker post to me. Maybe I’ll find something better for 1001; if not have a great day anyway.

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